I just want some fatty goodness

Have you ever gotten that little tickle in the back of your mouth?

Something quietly telling you to give up on your diet and give in? 

That is happing to me right now. 

I am at work right now and my little sugar addict in me wants something. 

What does it want to ask? 

(That is seriously the stupidest question in the whole world, if you think about it) 

Chocolate

Dang you Chocolate. 

No matter what. . . my taste buds will always want you. 

Like right now. . . 

So you would think that because my boss has said "You can have anything that catches your eye" I would not have any problem finding something with chocolate in the house. 

Dead wrong. 

Going through the pantry, freezer, hidden stashes that only my boss, her sisters and I know about. I can't find anything. 

This is what I find however. . . 

Not Chocolate. . . 

Not close to chocolate. . . 

(However, these are really good. My new favorite gummy flavor, but way expensive!)

Once again. . . not chocolate. 

(is anyone seeing the pattern, i'm seeing?) 

Although these items might feed your sweet tooth, it does not do justice to mine, for the fact that it is all fruit or organic. 

I'm not saying anything is wrong with these. Some of these actually taste good. 

But how can there be no chocolate in a house with three woman? 

Haven't they heard of "PMS feel good food"????

So I am stuck. . . with no chocolate and the little kid inside me crying. 

All I want is some chocolate. 

Is that so hard to ask for? 

Peace and love! 

A little heartbroken. . .

There is this part, inside me that has just fully never healed. I don't know why. I think it is a reminder of what heartbreak feels like. . . also to remind me that others can feel this awful craving too. 

I say craving . . . because don't we crave it? 

We as feeling hungry humans, crave love. To be loved. To feel needed and wanted. Yet we know what the consequences are for it also. 

The fear and wanting to fall. 

Wanting to fall for the individual who will love every light and dark thing about you. 

No judging. Just pure love. 

Then there is that fear of falling for that individual,

having them lift you up to what seems the highest point in your life. 

Then . . . 

you are let go. 

dropped

back into what you think is the darkest place, 

a living nightmare, 

your personal hell. 

Why do I bring this up? 

because that aching part of me, knows I've done that. 

I've dropped someone.

Made them feel like I didn't love them.  

Some I know of. 

Some I have no clue. 

and that feeling of letting someone down is ripping more of that part of me. 

For I know what it feels like. 

If you are reading this. 

I'm sorry. 

I don't know what to say other then that. 

I'm so sorry, 

I hurt you and caused you such a pain. 

I'm sorry. 

Thank you for reading. 

Peace and love.

Life is a. . .

Life can be a whole lot of things. . .

A puzzle. . .
A maze. . .
Chapters. . .
A Rose. . . . with thorns of course.
A cookie. . .
A whatchamacallit. . .
A stage. . .
A song. . .
A highway. . .
A dance floor. . .
A master piece
A colored pencil. . .
A hourglass. . .
A piece of cake. . .
A mystery . . .
A picture. . .
A letter. . .
A shoe. . .
A music box. . .
A ring . . .
A candle. . .
A hallway. . .
A photo. . .
Sunglasses. . .
A jug of milk. . .
A door. . .
A beauty . . .


Call it what you will. Life is a crock pot of a bunch of stuff you found in the freezer and thought would be good for a meal.

Love you all.